Ram and Shyam were classmates in Engineering College. Ram was studious and intelligent, and had always been a class topper. Shyam, on the other hand, struggled to concentrate on his studies, leading to poor results in his exams. In a couple of semesters, much to his dismay, Shyam came precariously close to failing. But, for the seventh semester final exams, Shyam made a sincere effort to work hard. When the results were announced, Ram scored in upper seventies at the top of the class, and Shyam was just a couple of marks behind him. Their reactions, however, were in stark contrast. Ram shrugged his shoulders and casually put his report card away. He barely smiled, and went on his way. Another class-topping semester was business as usual for him. His classmate Shyam clutched his report card, staring at it as though he were in some kind of trance. Then he looked up, with his pupils dilating. His face lit up in a broad smile, stretching from ear to ear. He held the report card high above his head and jumped up and down, screaming something indistinct. This was the first time he achieved such great results, transforming from the brink of failure to second in the class.
Amar and Prem grew up in the same building, and went to school together. As they moved to college, Prem blossomed into an extroverted personality who was especially popular with the girls. Amar remained relatively shy and reserved. His childhood buddy had gone from one girlfriend to another and was rarely seen without a girl by his side. Amar too longed for a relationship, but he didn’t get close to any of the girls he knew. On Valentine’s Day, during their third year of college, both the buddies set out on a mission. Amar was determined to summon the courage to go up to the girl he had been fond of for a while, and ask her out. Prem was looking for a new girlfriend and had his sights firmly set on the hottest babe from the junior batch. Both made their proposals in their own unique way: Prem with a necklace and a public message on the notice board; Amar with a simple rose and a quiet word in the corner of the hallway. Both were successful in their endeavors. Prem put his arm around the pretty junior girl’s waist, and strode out of college to join his friends at their favorite haunt. He showed no sign of surprise that he had received a positive response. After all, he always did, from every girl that he had gone after. His friend Amar, parted company of his new beau with a promise of a phone call later on, and then went to an isolated corner to celebrate. His face was flushed and had turned scarlet. His hair stood on end, and he couldn’t control the goose bumps that ran through his body. He skipped around in a circle and did a little dance. He couldn’t believe his luck.
Neha and Sonam were sisters, who went to different colleges. Both were passionate about dance. Every year, both the sisters entered the annual dance competition of their respective colleges. For three years in a row, Neha, the elder sister by a year, won the first prize. She was a naturally gifted dancer. Sonam too, loved to dance, but always got nervous when she went on stage, and fumbled her moves. She failed to win any prize. During their final year, once again the sisters geared up for the dance competition. This time, Sonam, found the self-confidence that she previously lacked. Both Neha and Sonam claimed the first prize in their respective colleges. Neha dumped her trophy alongside the others in her closet and didn’t give it a second glance. She was so accustomed to winning and had so many trophies. Sonam came homes and cuddled the trophy like it was a little baby. She balanced it on her head and jumped on the bed, giggling uncontrollably. Her dream of winning the dance competition had finally been realized.
Karan was seated comfortably on his couch. It was late in the evening, and he was watching his favorite television program. He sipped orange juice from a glass kept on the side table. He was almost oblivious of the glass in his hand and the juice in it. Arjun was outdoors playing tennis for three hours on a hot summer day, with the temperature soaring to thirty five degrees Celsius. The sweat drenched every pore of his skin. In the scorching heat, his body felt like the inside of an oven. Then, Arjun picked up an identical glass of orange juice and took one long, tantalizing, refreshing gulp. He exhaled deeply, looking at the juice as though it were an elixir sent down from heaven.
The point of the above stories is that everything in life consists of pairs of opposites. To truly enjoy the things that give us happiness, we must first experience the other side of them. Only then will we appreciate the value of what we have.
In fact, most things can only be defined in terms of their opposite. Imagine a place where there was always sunlight at all times. It never got dark or cold. It never rained or snowed. In such a place, there would be no concept of summer or winter. Summer only exists because of the contrast to its anti-thesis, the winter. One has no significance without the other.
The saintly people who are on a higher spiritual plane will tell you that you must move beyond pairs of opposites: good and evil, light and dark, day and night. To attain nirvana, you must find your inner, immovable center and be in a state of non-dual consciousness.
For those who are not on such a spiritual journey, think about all the things that bring you joy in your life. Have you previously experienced the other side? Now, think about the joys that you wish for, but haven’t experienced yet. If you are deprived of that pleasure, then you are currently seeing the other side of things. When you see people around who already have these things, just imagine how much more you will cherish them, when you do experience them, because you have had the privilege of living through the other side.
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